Why We Feel & Act The Way We Do: Three Influences

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There are many different ways of explaining why we feel and behave the way we do. One of the more practical and simple explanations has to do with three components: our biological predispositions, our developmental history, and our cognitive framework- how we interpret and evaluate our experiences.

Our Biological Predispositions

This first component is about the way we're put together by nature. Similar to our physical characteristics, human beings have different biological tendencies when it comes to how we feel and act. Some of us experience our emotions more often, more intensely, and for longer periods of time than others do. Behaviorally, some of us are more energetic and active than others.

The good news is that these biological tendencies are more manageable today than ever before. Since the 1980s, a broad range of pharmaceutical and therapeutic interventions have emerged, making it much easier to maximize the benefits of our biological predispositions and minimize their limitations.


Our Developmental History

The second component that has to do with the ways in which we function psychologically is our developmental histories. Some folks have experienced many painful and challenging experiences, while others have had a smoother trajectory. While there's no question that this is a crucial dimension of our psychological functioning, it's also the one component where the events themselves cannot be changed. However, what is possible – and very important for our psychological well-being – is to come to terms with these experiences and transform the ways in which we relate to them.


Our Cognitive Framework

The last component has to do with the ways in which we interpret and evaluate our experience. I refer to this as our cognitive framework. In my opinion, it's very difficult to identify an emotional or behavioral reaction to an event without first interpreting and evaluating it.

While our biological make-up and our developmental histories are largely beyond our control, I believe that our cognitive framework is entirely our creation. It's not that we're simply taught this or that; it's that we choose to learn this or that. If you don't believe me, just think of all the things you were taught that you actively chose not to learn.


Takeaways:

  1. Your genes, your history and your cognitive framework all have to do with why you feel and act the way you do.

  2. Addressing all of these can help improve our psychological functioning

  3. Of the three, your cognitive framework is the one you have most control of and is most amenable to change.

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